We’ve all heard of Blackberry Thumb - that condition you get from too much Blackberry use (or other mobile devices) in which your thumbs turn into hooked, clawed parodies of normal human thumbs and cause vast amounts of pain. I take this as a possible fact and then I shove it to the back of my brain where things like origami with aluminum foil and contemplating the fractal nature of broccoli live.
I also happen to take not one, but two trains during my daily commute, which allows for the things at the back of my brain to come forward and romp about while I’m not paying attention.
My first train is a well appointed commuter jobby where riders have the luxury of only occasionally having to sit in someone’s lap. My second train is more of a traditional underground number which is pretty boring except for the occasional flash of a dead white, club wielding guy I see between stops occasionally.
The subway is also a bit more crowded than the commuter train, forcing us to somethings stand on each other’s shoulders. This close proximity allows me practice my favorite past time quite easily - people watching.
Over the last few days I’ve noticed a curious phenomonon. Perhaps it’s brand new, perhaps it’s just made it past that filter that hangs out between my eyes and my brain. There seem to be a growing number of people who are on the old side of young, say in their mid forties, who are peering at their Blackberries from a distance of about 27 nanometers.
The guy standing on the platform next to me litterally had to keep brushing nose prints off of his screen.
He’s not the first one I’ve noticed doing this and it’s usually on the subway. On the commuter train, most people are curled up on their seats (there’s nothing more uplifting than the site of two rival executives gently snoring as they spoon each other on a cracked plastic seat) and to tired to function. By the time we’ve all reached the underground, Blackberries and other data phones are being flashed around like lightsabers at a Padawan slumber party.
As folks get older and refuse to accept that their eyes are hanging out back in 2003, these little devices get closer and closer to their faces. I’d probably be no exception except I already own a pair of spectacles.
Blackberry Nose. We’re soon going to have an entire population that will be able to pick out the smell of non-reflective transparent plastic from their crooked beaks. Next time your out in public with a business crowd, check it out and let me know how many instances you see.
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